Lupus while Battling Covid
My job is to take full personal benefit of my waking day so I may function at my best Lupie capacity. Of course, some days are more active than others. I have to compromise but my intent is present. My twins started middle school two weeks ago. The first week was an amazing week! I woke up at 6 AM and made breakfast, ironed their school clothes and bid them farewell. My husband drove them to school a little past 7am and I went back to sleep. How did I spend my day? I exercised, made some artwork, read and walked my big pup, Chica, After school pickup, there's family time catch-up during dinner. I go to bed at 10 PM. Those are my best, best Lupie days.
By the end of that amazing week...one of the twins contracted Covid. Covid is a playground for the chronicically ill. It has been six days since I left my room. My body is reacting similarly to when I was recovering from my chemotherapy treatment. I can't think clearly. My entire body screams in pain. In the span of the week, I developed rashes, fever sores, tightening of my chest, vomiting, headaches. I am so tired and overwhelmed by the amount of consumed prescribed medication. All of the Covid/Lupus symptoms have just melded into one big cluster-fuck. This moment is filled with my physical and mental despair due to my mental/physical absence. This moment...
“We draw our strength from the very despair in which we have been forced to live. We shall endure.”- Cesar Chavez
Courage is not the absence of despair; it is, rather, the capacity to move ahead in spite of despair.”- Rollo May