Aha Lupie moment
I was watching The Me You Can't See on Apple TV with my oldest daughter. I thought she would benefit from viewing the show. I was not prepared from my own Aha moment. Only until I started watching did I notice my breath catch in my throat. All these individuals came from varying backgrounds but they all suffer internally. As an individual diagnosed with PTSD, I did not fully understand the diagnosis. Types of events that can lead to PTSD include:
-physical or sexual assault, abuse, including childhood or domestic abuse.
-exposure to traumatic events at work, including remote exposure.
-serious health problems, such as being admitted to intensive care.
-childbirth experiences, such as losing a baby.
I was sexually assaulted at the age of 14 by my cousin, Mario in Colombia, South America. I was on a visit with my parents. I kept quiet. Upon my college graduation, I started my career teaching in Paterson, New Jersey. I grew up there and naively believed the educational system only needed really dedicated teachers. Instead I was harassed by my all male Principal, Vice Principal and my Arts Supervisor. I initially did not fight back but I kept a notebook and went to my Union Representative. Similar situations occurred when I took a job at Englewood, New Jersey. After many grievances, my body collapsed and that was the beginning of my ER visits. I was told by many female teachers that no punishment would ever come to the boys club. My light was being snuffed out daily. I was not dealing with my past trauma and it was affecting me physically daily. The mind connection which I was not nurturing caused the current explosion of issues.
Lupies, my job now is to only take care of my mental and physical being. My healing comes from putting my words out into the universe and helping someone, as I once searched for help.